Math Jokes

Category: Joke Board

Post 1 by HellTabby666 (Shh... quiet, you might piss somebody off.) on Thursday, 24-Nov-2016 23:07:12

A couple of math jokes. Let me know which ones you liked, loved, hated, despised, died from, threw up at, etc etc etc.
Joke #a: 4 out of 3 people don't understand fractions.
Joke #2: There are three types of people in this world: those who can count, and those who can't.
Joke #3: MATH stands for:
Mental
Abuse
To
Humans.
Joke #4: This joke is a clissic sort of I think maybe, but here goes:
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 8 9.
har har har so funny.

Post 2 by the oracle (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Friday, 25-Nov-2016 4:50:03

lol yes!.

I love why was 6 afraid of 7

jokes 2 and 3 were also really funny (I can so relate to the third one!)

Post 3 by Shepherdwolf (I've now got the bronze prolific poster award! now going for the silver award!) on Friday, 25-Nov-2016 9:39:23

Here's another one:

There are 10 types of people: those who know binary, and those who don't.

Post 4 by HellTabby666 (Shh... quiet, you might piss somebody off.) on Friday, 25-Nov-2016 11:59:19

And I am one of those who don't.

Post 5 by the oracle (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Friday, 25-Nov-2016 12:25:50

I don't get it?

(I guess I don't know it either)

Post 6 by HellTabby666 (Shh... quiet, you might piss somebody off.) on Friday, 25-Nov-2016 12:28:21

Oracle of Seasons, Oracle of Ages. We can be ununderstanding together. :p

Post 7 by vh (This site is so "educational") on Friday, 25-Nov-2016 13:34:06

Binary is all combos of 1 and 0

Post 8 by Shepherdwolf (I've now got the bronze prolific poster award! now going for the silver award!) on Friday, 25-Nov-2016 13:35:34

The math you're used to is defined as "base ten". The digits 0 through 9 make up the number set, and you add to it.
Binary is much, much simpler than this. It only uses 0 and 1. Computers use binary a great deal, actually.
So in binary, the number 0 is 0, the number 1 is 01, the number 2 is 10, the number 3 is 11, etc.
It's weird. Just trust me.
So in other words, 2 = 10.
So, 10 types of people who know binary. Make more sense now?

Post 9 by HellTabby666 (Shh... quiet, you might piss somebody off.) on Friday, 25-Nov-2016 13:38:55

yup. it does. thanks. I learned something...more than if i was at school.

Post 10 by Voyager (I just keep on posting!) on Sunday, 27-Nov-2016 21:04:38

So infinity told pi to stop being irrational and pi responded, "get real."

Post 11 by Raskolnikov (I'll have the last word, thank you!) on Sunday, 27-Nov-2016 23:00:38

"Don't you get it, Bart? Derivative dy = 3 r squared dr over 3, or r squared dr, or r dr r."

Post 12 by HellTabby666 (Shh... quiet, you might piss somebody off.) on Sunday, 27-Nov-2016 23:03:20

You made my brain implode. I mean...I guess I won't need it for anything...

Post 13 by sia fan bp (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Monday, 28-Nov-2016 11:46:30

math jokes! yay.
Love the third one, I hate math!

Post 14 by Voyager (I just keep on posting!) on Monday, 28-Nov-2016 12:59:02

Post eleven made me groan.

Post 15 by Voyager (I just keep on posting!) on Monday, 28-Nov-2016 13:03:35

"How do blind people know when they're done wiping?" explained using calculus:
Friction (f) and therefore cleanness depend on the type of stuff being cleaned off, the brand of toilet paper and the number of wipes. When f is high, and the derivative of f approaches 0, I'm done.

Post 16 by ADVOCATOR! (Finally getting on board!) on Monday, 28-Nov-2016 18:46:09

Classic fo ya:
One math book is talking to another. The other said: "Would just leave me alone??! I have enough of my own Problems!"

Post 17 by ADVOCATOR! (Finally getting on board!) on Monday, 28-Nov-2016 18:51:04

So, for you non-IPhone users, I have to ad this from Siri. I guess it's considered math, since telling time involves numbers:
"The past, present, and the future, walked into a bar. It was tense."

Post 18 by HellTabby666 (Shh... quiet, you might piss somebody off.) on Monday, 28-Nov-2016 18:51:05

lol. I've heard it like this:
Why did the math book go to a therapist?
Because it had a lot of problems.

Post 19 by HellTabby666 (Shh... quiet, you might piss somebody off.) on Monday, 28-Nov-2016 18:54:17

lol. How about this?:
Me: Siri, what's 0 dividied 0?
Siri: Well, imagine you have 0 cookies, to share among 0 friends. And the cookie monster is sad because you have 0 cookies. And you are sad because you have 0 friends.